We’ve heard the old phrase that talk is cheap but what if, talk is actually worth its weight in gold.
Everyone seems to have a different relationship with using affirmations, as well as the belief in their power to work. No matter how frequently someone uses affirmations, we know the use of affirmations can be extremely helpful when someone needs a reminder of any kind. Besides, what better time to need a reminder that when someone is in labor.
Using Affirmations help to verbally support, motivate, or encourage someone mentally, emotionally, or even physically.
As doulas, we witness labor taking our clients through a natural progression where we see them become less talkative, more focused, and less interested in hearing others talk as well. So, when contractions continue getting longer, stronger, and closer together we know it will take more focus to breathe through them and the simple “You can do it” just won’t cut it, we have to choose our words wisely.
I know the words I choose to say to my client in labor will help bring reassurance, strength, guidance, and comfort, however, I do feel that encouraging words from friends and family bring a unique voice to the birthing parent that can help motivate them in a different way.
During our prenatal appointments, I tell my clients that I want them to write out affirming words or phrases that will resonate with them, put them on index cards, and bring them to the labor. I suggest that they also seek to have friends and family write out special wishes, phrases, or inside jokes to read out in labor. Making a video or voice recording to play during labor is a way to elevate this request.
Bonus points if the laboring parent doesn’t see or hear any of them until the big day.
I love this approach for a couple of reasons.
First off, it’s a fun activity for the couple to do together and allows for creativity and love to flow. Second, when it’s their words I’m saying back to them, I feel it hits home on a different level. It’s as if they are speaking to themselves, and this can help build the self-confidence that they really can do this.
When the words are from loved ones, it has the power it helps evoke those oxytocin rich feelings which is what we want to see happen in labor.
Plus, the cards make a wonderful addition to a baby book or perhaps even a beautifully framed piece of art for the baby’s room.
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